questa: (Default)
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Boxing Day went well, I was up at 6am and James before that. We went to Marketplace Way and it was pretty dead even though the craft store had opened at 7. I thought it would be nuts but nope, hardly anyone.

After that we went to Marks and then Canadian Tire, then home so James could make us an awesome breakfast and then we were off again to Metropolis Comics and Games.

I was sad they didn't have any Clint Barton figures, they said they had gotten the huge one I fell in love with when the movie first came out and that it had been $189. That thing looks so realistic I could have married it. @_@

Then we decided to peek at Metrotown but after a quick pop into Sakura media we got the hell out of there.

I spent a lot of my Christmas money but sadly I didn't really get any sales. Had a 30% off coupon for my entire purchase at Michael's but that had nothing to do with Boxing Day, I think they only thing I got on sale was a 6 drawer storage thingy to keep my craft supplies in which was $44 on sale for $17.

Some of what I got:

The storage thingy
A cute blue lap desk for the laptop
a memory foam bath mat for Taro's poor bones.
some more acrylic paints.
a thingy for paint that will also work as a mold
a couple paint brushes
Mod Podge
Glitter
I forget what else....

The next day James took me back to Michael's because I had another coupon for 50% off of any one item so I picked up the resin with that.
Later that day I met up with Lily at Metrotown to do a trade, she always looks so awesome...I love her style and should poke her to model for me when the weather gets better~

Felt like I got the better end of the deal T_T because I traded her some tarot cards and she made me the most beautiful necklace....I need to get a photo of it but omg...I love it so much! She also traded me a bag of stuff she's gotten from craft faires. Thank you again for that! I meant to message her that night but stuff happened and I was in BLAAAAAAH mode for like 4 days. My brother actually staged a mini intervention with me because I think my mood scared him....oops T_T

Anyway, on to the bag of goodies....I spent over an hour going through it all, so much neat stuff....and a lot of it I can use for crafting. I still haven't finished putting all of it away.

Pictures and stuff )
questa: (F/R love)
Trying to think of what we've been up to the past few weeks...
James and I went to the Yule party which was fun, hadn't seen most people since before Alberta so that was nice. I got to talk to Pam & Amy for awhile ^_^

We also went to Winter Solstice down on Granville Island Market, it was mostly a lot of drumming so I started to get a headache. James enjoyed it but after a couple hours it all sounds the same to me. We still had a nice time together though ^_^

Then we had a troupe Mage game potluck, it was fun to get dressed up for. It was IC but most people bounced between OOC and IC so it could get confusing at times. Woke up the next morning to a pile of drama surrounding it which is sad. I see a lot of friendships being affected and not even sure if game will still happen. I think if people had just told the truth then all of it could have been avoided. So glad I am not directly involved o_o

Christmas was great, we went to my brothers for dinner and of course it was Katherine's first ^_^ I gave her a kitty hat with matching mittens that I've had put away for awhile and a Rapunzel doll.
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She also got a couple super cute outfits from some customer's at my brothers work and an ENGRAVED SILVER SPOON from Tiffany's from a friend of his o_o!

Had a good dinner, opened gifts. Today we are mostly resting, going to make a gingerbread village today since we didn't get to it. Just a kit because I've been so busy and the only baking I did was an apple pie.

Hope everyone else had a great Christmas ^_^

Tomorrow James and I are doing boxing day stuffz which is funny because we swore we wouldn't this year. And this time it was his idea lol. But he wants to go to Mark's and we both want to do the craft store and Petsmart~
questa: (Hayley & Padme (Rainbows))
Been mostly posting to my Tumblr http://photography-kitty.tumblr.com/ but I'll dump some of the text entries here:

2 days ago:

The pain in my neck/base of my skull was so bad yesterday that I looked online to see if there were any walk-in clinics open on a Sunday. Found one and James took me. The doctor was actually nice and listened to me. He asked if I was having any other symptoms so I mentioned all the joint pain I've been having and the pins and needles.

Which I was having a lot of while I was seeing him in my left elbow.
He did a lot of small neurological tests and then gave me some Celebrex (which is good because I still can’t afford my prescription for it from months ago so now I have about a weeks worth. He also gave me some pain killers and a strong muscle relaxant to take before bed and said if its still hurting in 4 days then go see my doctor because I may need a CT scan.

Came home, popped my pills and that combined with being awake since about 12am I was passing out reading tumblr so I crashed. Here’s hoping the pills fix me~

Wedding dress I love = http://24.media.tumblr.com/e09c8faaaab16383437c0e3cf00d4cd5/tumblr_metkh05Efp1qf3bvio1_500.jpg

3 Days ago:

Did a bit of Christmas shopping today, and by a bit I mean bought ONE thing….picked up a doll for Katherine. Still not sure what I’m getting everyone else o_o The mall was so crazy and my legs were dying. I came home to a comfy bed + pain killers and napped twice. Was planning on going down to a craft fair and like LEAVING at 5am (crazy talk omg :X) but I should have done that yesterday as now the translink trip planner is like lololz no busses 4U! /swt The earliest I could get there is 7am and I wanted to be there at 6.

Oh well, I didn’t really relish sitting in the freezing cold for 4hrs just to get a swag bag, walking in the DARK, ALONE, etc…plus theres the whole issue of, I went to Metrotown for 2hrs and now I can hardly walk. Fuu. 5 days later my neck still hurts, yay car accident flares. Going to see the doctor Monday because ow.

One week ago:

Tests
http://www.healthyplace.com/psychological-tests/ptsd-test/
Current score is : 17
PTSD Test Scoring:
1-3: (few symptoms of PTSD)
4-9: (PTSD likely)
10+: (You display many symptoms of PTSD)
——-
http://www.healthyplace.com/psychological-tests/quick-inventory-of-depressive-symptomatology/
Current score is : 21
Scoring: Your score from the depression screening quiz is above. Rating the severerity of your depression symptoms:
0-5 (None)
6-10 (Mild)
11-15 (Moderate)
16-20 (Severe)
21+ (Very Severe)

One week ago:

Monday: Went to Yaletown to see what was going on for International Day of Persons with a Disability, looked around at all the different booths and I was a little surprised when only 3 people bothered speaking to us. One woman telling us about adaptive sports, another really nice woman from the Vancouver Aquarium and then an older man talking about some artwork a group had done.

No one else even bothered to make eye contact X_x

Was this because we both looked healthy? I was fairly limpy the entire time I was there and hanging on to James for support. It was weird.
We only stayed about half an hour and then met up with Ian to wander around downtown, only popped into a couple stores because my body had had it so we went to grab some food and head home. Tuesday was spent in bed resting or asleep o_o now my hours are all over the place again. Fuu.

One week ago:

Friday: Legs mostly held up and pain was tolerable, made it to two events and other than some weakness and calf cramps it was all good. Of course like 5mins after I got home my left knee collapsed so hard it was like someone kicked it. I slammed into the counter but managed to keep upright and not hurt myself.

Crashed after the party, got up and got ready for Changeling. Chris didn't mention anything about my NPC so I just picked out one of my costumes and wore that hoping it would work and it did XD
Had a seriously awesome time and didn't die so I get to play her again next month ^_^

I stood for most of the game o_o just had too much to do so I know I’m going to pay for that but whatever, I had fun.
Hoping I can go out to the International Disability day thing later today but after 2 days of events I will be amazed o_o!
I should go to bed now but James and I are working on our Changeling characters for the restart. Can’t wait <3

One week ago:

Was talking to a newer friend today and was explaining bits of a past bad situation so they would have some context and even though its been two and a half years (and add into that 2 support groups and some therapy) and I was surprised that my hands started visibly shaking and that it made me want to cry. I really thought I was mostly over that bit. James was standing right next to me and even he was surprised at how much I was shaking.

It also bothered me because it feels like with that reaction the person still has power over me, I don’t want them to be able to affect me like that.

But it always reminded me of just how bad it was and how glad I am to be out of that situation. And how glad I am to have such awesome supportive friends ^_^


One week ago:

Stupid left knee has been extra bad the past few days, although extra bad seems like it has become normal….which is sad.
Today while James and I were out walking it was doing it so much I was not able to put any weight on it at all, and my poor right leg was exhausted from holding me up.

Thankfully James is always holding my hand which almost always prevents me from hitting the ground when I go down but this time he had to throw my arm around his shoulders and haul me home that way. And as we got even closer it got so bad that he just scooped me up and carried me. I am glad I have such an awesome boyfriend. ^_^

After getting me home he went back out to pick me up some orange juice I was craving and now I am in bed with all my fuzzy blankets and my legs propped up. So glad I don’t have to go anywhere tomorrow T_T
Looking forward to the Imaginarius Fantasticus Christmas Faire This weekend! Might dress up for it, not sure.
questa: (Hayley & Padme (Rainbows))
Oh god, so much to post about T_T
I'm home, back in Vancouver. It came up rather fast giving us about a week to get everything in place but James was called about 2 different jobs and they needed him in Vancouver for interviews/auditions.

Sadly for those 2 jobs (one he had auditioned to play a zombie but they actually wanted him as a soldier XD) they both had pre-set audition dates set for the day after they called him. No way we could have driven back in time. So he figured we better just get back here....and I was fine with it because although there are many things I love about Alberta....there are many things I hate.

And being an animal lover out there, it will break you.

We had Sierra's claws trimmed right before we left which was a great idea but she CHEWED through her carrier....so she spent the ride on top of the carrier or on my lap. Not the safest but we couldn't do much else. We are getting her a METAL carrier soon....she won't be escaping from that! Again she wasn't to pleased with the long drive but seemed to remember it from last time. I know she got a bit queasy but she didn't throw up this time and also seemed to remember the hotel. She had a great time running around and wanted to drink water from the bathroom sink.

I actually got kind of scared once we were in BC, I've been used to STRAIGHT roads for months and not a lot of traffic so once we starting hitting curves...oy :X

James managed to get a 1 bedroom in his old apartment building, sadly Sierra has less room to run around in now but more to see out the window. I was happy to be back in civilization and immediately went and got my hair cut then dyed pink a few days later. We got back on a Friday and instead of moving stuff in the next day we went to V-Con since the dealers room & artist alley = free :P

Made the mistake of walking most of the way to the hotel since someone mentioned it only takes like 10mins.....BAD idea. By the time we got there I was so sore :X I'm glad we went though, got to see a bunch of friends and I ended up going back again on Sunday even though it almost killed me.

Its so nice having decent places to shop and GOOD PRICES OMG....fruit is so cheap! Also I really missed having a library that would let me order books, Chapters, Starbucks, Booster Juice, Purdy's Chocolates and Godiva. James is still looking for a job so if anyone knows of anything please let me know. Especially if its for meat cutting.

Dana's water broke on Saturday, she ended up in the ER that night with pain, they gave her morphine and sent her home. She went back up to Burnaby General Sunday morning but they said she wasn't far enough along and couldn't take her and the only place that could would be St. Pauls X_x so they sent her all the way there and then they induced her. My little niece Katherine Elizabeth was born 5:52am and is 9lbs. ^_^

Katherine

My Mum and I went down to see them and omg fuck transit and people srsly. My legs are bad enough just trying to walk down the street but getting shoved and bumped into constantly and having to stand on a crowded bus/skytrain = baaah.

Katherine was adorable and slept the whole time, I took a few pictures, we stayed for about an hour then made the hellish trip home. Having used all my spoons and then some. I crashed out for 12+hrs.
Mummy and baby get to go home sometime today and I will probably go visit sometime this weekend.

I bought her some HK stuff
<3

Luna is coming up this month on the 26th XD!
She will be here for Halloween (still not sure of our plans since we have like 4 things to choose from) and for Anime Evolution. Can't wait to see her ^_^

Rawr

Sep. 23rd, 2012 03:08 pm
questa: (Default)
I know people mean well and are trying to help but oy, sometimes I want to bang my head against a wall.

When talking with someone the other day (someone who doesn’t actually know me, we just talk when I’m at the place she works) and we got on to the subject of my knees. I explained briefly whats wrong with them.

Her - “Oh! You should use *insert some random cream I forget the name of*. It worked great for the pain of my sprained ankle!”

Erm…sorry, no. I have had sprained ankles before and while they can be quite painful they HEAL, the pain will eventually go away. I don’t have that luxury, my pain never goes away, sometimes its just more manageable than others.

Also, I have yet to hear of someone feeling suicidal due to pain from a sprained ankle.
Your creams will not work for me, I have tried many and they don’t do a thing.

Her - “Or, if you wanted to not take hard drugs or super strong anti inflammatory’s you could take this natural *insert other name I’ve forgotten* tea!”
ahahaha….no :X

Her - “Make sure you don’t baby your knees, that will make them weaker”

Maybe for some people, not for me. If I didn’t “baby my knees” I probably wouldn’t be walking. Yes I walk, yes I CAREFULLY exercise them but FUCKING NO I CANNOT and WILL not do those fucking squats you are showing me ESPECIALLY AFTER I just told you my knees really DO NOT BEND anymore. I have not been able to “squat” for a long time and I can’t even really get down on the floor anymore without someone helping me up. And the last time I oh so carefully KNEELED, one of my knees popped out of joint and I face planted into the floor.

Her - “You are too young to have these problems”

Yes, I always was and still am…but it sucks and I do have them and they aren’t going anywhere.
Sitting is hell, even though I do it slowly and its sad when the one thing I can’t wait to go buy is a raised toilet seat. Depressing and embarrassing but fuck it. I would like to sit down WITHOUT PAIN~! Also, I need a cute little cane or some forearm crutches.
questa: (F/R love)
Home soon, thankfully~
There are a lot of things I will miss but I am glad to be getting back. We don't have a set date just yet but its either end of September or right after Thanksgiving. Right now we are looking for a 1 or 2 bedroom in New West and are in contact with James' old landlord. He has one apartment available in the building right next door to his old one. He is e-mailing the info on it asap.

Photos )
questa: (Default)
After everything that went down 2 years ago and the loss of some friends and some that I kept on FB and LJ even after stupid comments were made....well today I saw a comment in someone else's FB who was a victim of something awful, this "friends" comment was very sweet & supportive and yet the comment said to me? Not so much.....

I'm so glad for the people that stood by me and continue to do so. For those that didn't, I wish you well but you are no longer a part of my life.
questa: (Default)
And now for a post about ~other stuffz~

Had my birthday, other than getting older it was awesome :P
I told James that instead of buying a big map to hang up and putting a tack on all the places I've been I will instead buy a large poster of the human body and just tack on what part gets fucked up next :P

During the night my left shoulder was so messed up I couldn't even lay down. Going to the ER was a thought but NO! I had my awesome birthday gift of HORSEBACK RIDING in the morning! I popped a Celebrex and told my shoulder it could wait until AFTER!

It was a hot day so I sunscreened it up as much as possible, we got to the ranch on time along with James' Dad and his brother, Scott.

I'm not sure if it was because it was so hot and maybe the horses were tired....but they seemed kinda devoid of any personality X_x

I rode Willow, she didn't kill me which as great and I only almost tumbled off her once when she stopped and put her head down really fast o_o
James had the biggest horse there o_o Belle reminded me of something from Game of Thrones. The horse The Mountain Who Rides rides.

After that we did the giant corn maze they had, it was fun but a rather stupid idea on such a hot day o_o! Thankfully it only took us about 45mins to get out!

Later that evening we had an awesome dinner cooked by his Mum who even made my favourite to go along with it, fried bannock XD

Managed not to go to the hospital after all, Celebrex is a wonderful thing~
Had a trip into Slave Lake, bought some much needed clothes, new jeans and stuff.

Our plan for coming back is now early October....I want to be there for when my niece is born XD
We will start apartment hunting soon, preferably in New West so if anybody knows of any decent, clean, quiet 1 bedrooms please let me know~

The amazingly yummy chocolate raspberry cake with marshmallow icing James had made for me from Wholesome Jo's.
James got me the nicest birthday cake XD

Pictures! )

Creepers

Aug. 17th, 2012 03:26 pm
questa: (Blaaaah)
http://captainawkward.com/2012/08/07/322-323-my-friend-group-has-a-case-of-the-creepy-dude-how-do-we-clear-that-up/

It's sad how often this happens in groups, we've had a few creepers in LARP (and in the anime crowd) and people usually defend them or keep quiet so as not to cause drama or make the creeper feel bad.

There was one guy who would always make Pervy comments to the girls and he spent one game (4 hours...) talking about what kind of underwear my character would wear. o_o And how would she feel if he bought her some? I just kept trying to change the subject.

He also started messaging me online, which was fine until he started suggesting idea's for photo-shoots I could do with my brothers then girlfriend...

They were all really pervy bdsm related and he would send images to show what he meant. He also offered to come help out on any of the shoots. o_O!

I told him no thank you and that we would never do those types of shoots, I really wish I had just told him he was making me seriously fucking uncomfortable and to stop it. But instead I just blocked him online.

Another guy would make the odd crude comment and one day he grabbed my ass. I said "don't do that!" and he just laughed. I thought about making a bigger deal of it but didn't want to embarrass him or be a drama queen. But it bothered me that I was suffering just so someone else wouldn't feel bad.

Another creeper situation, it ended up with a girl and something bad happening at a game.
I told her I would go to the police station with her (a short walk away from the venue) and she agreed. I went upstairs to grab her clothes so she could change out of her costume and 5mins later when I came back down, one of the guys pulled me aside to let me know that guy A and guy B had talked her out of it. I was like wtf why?! He told me they didn't want the game being interrupted by cops, after all....the players from out of town were all here....it was a special game. I thanked him for the info and silently seethed.

All the times the guys told us if anything ever happened, let them know, they'd help us..right, they forgot to mention that if it messed with their game...forget it.

At another game, I was walking off with two male players....one I thought of as a good friend, that friend said to the other guy while grinning at me "wanna go halvers on a rape charge? Lolz!"

......

I gave them both shit and explained why that wasn't at all funny....they didn't seem to get it. /swt

The Alan issue is a good example, most people found what he was doing to me pretty repulsive yet no one said a word. A couple people explained they wanted to talk to him but didn't because they worried it would be taken out on me which I totally understood.

But when it came to the end of things so many people did a complete 180. They felt like because things had ended, that should be it. Why the heck would I avoid him? Why was I messed up? PTSD? Na, that's just me being a drama queen.God Forbid we ~villinize~ Alan. And how it was all my fault because I am too passive.

Part of that last bit was right, I was too passive.
But that did not make his behavior okay, nor did it make it my fault.
Same with letting it go one for so long, its not that I was okay with what was going on but because I saw how bad he could get when he was angry so I tried my very best to keep him in a happy mood.

Maybe he isn't a bad person...but his behaviour sure was.

I get that they don't know every detail about what went on (even if they think they do)and I don't expect them to ever get it sadly. I was having nightmares pretty much every night in the couple months leading up to the end and for a few after, PTSD is really not fun, I was going to councilling once a week and was in two different support groups that my Stop The Violence intake worker put me in. The last group finished up just as I was coming out to Alberta.

I finally got rid of my creeper, but i lost a lot of friends in the processes. They still hang out with him. With me? Not so much.

I went back to LARP after awhile but it felt uncomfortable, I was not part of that group anymore. I have thought about going back again because I need more that one troupe game a month and who knows...maybe some things will be different but I think waiting awhile was good. I needed time to deal with everything and also I am more assertive. Not as much as I'd like to be but I'm getting there. Hard reset is next year so I may as well wait until them anyway.

I'd like to make it a safer space for all the girls, no one should have to put up with any creeper behaviour.

Worth watching, a video done by the woman who ran my Monday group.


*Edit* my Mum took a look at the creeper link and actually asked me if that had to do with someone from our LARP group because it sounded so familiar to her. =\
questa: (Hayley & Padme (Rainbows))
Mittens
Untitled

* Got my x-ray results back....spinal arthritis...blaaah...my insides are falling apart...
She said its possible the car accident could have brought it on.

* Had my second ever migraine...thankfully did not need to go to the ER as this one was not quite as bad but lasted all day =\


Pictures! )
questa: (Default)
I have my first garden all planted and it seems to be doing well, several different kinds of flowers and one tomato plant. Photos are on Flickr and Facebook. More on FB because with the slow connections out here, uploading to Flickr is sometimes impossible.

Still doing PT once a week and it seems to be going okay, I have a doctors appointment this Sunday to go over my x-ray results and see if I can get another prescription for that Celebrex. It works amazingly well for the pain @_@! I was getting tired of being curled up in a ball crying and not able to function.

The weakness in it is still bad and effing annoying, I can only bend it a certain amount before it goes all wonky and gives me pain...and its still collapsing all the damn time. The other night I was talking to James....probably about two feet away from the stairs, not moving when it was like someone kicked my left kneecap and I fell sideways....thankfully James caught me before I fell down the stairs. A second later it did it again and I would have hit the floor but he was still holding on to me. He helped me downstairs and got me settled on the couch with a DVD.

Hung out with one of his old school friends (Giselle) the other day, she is awesome and geeky ^_^its nice to have a girl friend up here. ^_^
Northwest fair is happening in a couple weeks but not sure if we are going to bother with it....not at $100 a ticket X_x! I wouldn't mind seeing Fred Penner lolz but he's the only name on the concert list I recognize and I'm not even sure what all else is there...they don't even bother listing a schedule O_o

The bugs out here are horrible and huge...not to mention effing vicious o_o
* Mosquito's
* No see ums (tiny little bastards hence their name but thankfully for some weird reason, even though they bite me and leave a mark it doesn't itch)
* June bugs (WHY GOD?!)
* Horse flies
* Various other yucky bugs.

Since summer is coming, its only going to get worse o_o!

Looking forward to the wild roses here blooming and possibly going horseback riding. James may also set up a small paintball game with just his friends to make it safer for me since he'd kill them if I got hurt :P and they all seem to know he calls me "Mrs. Glass" for a reason.


Other than that days are mostly spent setting up the house (I want to re-paint), hanging out with the cats, dogs and horses XD Thunder-Cloud always comes trotting over to me when I go into the field to see her, I open my arms and she comes up for a cuddle...God I want to bring her home T_T her and Copper and Smokey and Mittens T_T!!
questa: (Blaaaah)
Sick right now with the cough/cold my Mum has..ugh. And on top of that I decided to stop my Effexor cold turkey so HELLO WITHDRAWAL SYMPTOMS FROM HELL OMG...for the past 4 DAYS T_T

Might have to miss Changeling tonight if I'm not any better (because I refuse to me one of those people that turns up ill and infects everyone) which really blows because if I go to Alberta with James at the end of this month it would mean missing the last game I'd be able to play for a few months.

Since he hasn't had any job offers here at all yet, going back for a bit is seeming more and more likely. There was one offer but its for an opportunity up in Northern Alberta for 3 months. If it goes through it'd be great because they'd put us up in a place outside of town, the pay is awesome plus he would also get 'isolation pay' on top of that. They could also easily get me a job but there's no way I can work at the moment.

Which might mean I end up staying here dealing with medical stuff and we do the long distance thing for a bit, we are fine with either but obviously would prefer to stay/go together.

Going would also mean missing the Masquerade and Ren Faire but that's okay, there's always next year.

Copied from FB:


This Saturday the place my brother work's is doing one of their open house things, its a nifty place to wander around (they buy & sell things to movie and tv shows like Supernatural and The Killing) plus free hot dogs & pop = win win.

This is where he gets me the old key's, a Coroner's office sign from The Outer Limits, and I ALMOST had a coffin but it got sold on me =(

http://www.jacksused.com/Strangestuff.html

James and I will be heading down and bringing Sierra in her carrier (still need a pet stroller dammit) since she hasn't been out in awhile and loves car rides.

Info:

Prizes! Food! Drinks!
Everything on sale!

Jack's Customer appreciation day!

Saturday April 14th
10:00-4:00pm

1st Prize- $500.00 shopping spree and Free delivery
2nd Prize-Stain glass window
Three 3rd Prizes-Garden Benches

50% select Items
Free delivery with purchases over $600.00
(Deliveries in Lower mainland only)

http://www.jacksused.com/
questa: (sitting pretty)
Knee's have been pretty crap but that's nothing new, with all of this I am still amazed people bother inviting me along anywhere anymore. Why bother, when I hardly ever show up? But they still do and for that I'm grateful.

Had a doctors appt. today and waited like 25mins for him to see me, not unusual that he makes people wait because his time management is crap but it is very unlike him to spend so much time with one patient. I figured it out when they finally finished tho, it wasn't my doctor...it was the awesome dude who replaces him when he's away. He even asked about my knee's even though that wasn't why I was there so I think I'll go back Monday and see him about my neck because I'm having flare up's and my normal doctor blows me off. Even my lawyer thinks he's a dick.

* Won 4 tickets to the Vancouver Aquarium in May so that was nifty ^_^
* Got real mail the other day, like...not bills lol. Some photo's a Flickr friend had taken and a letter.
* Tumblr and Pinterest are addictive :P
questa: (Blaaaah)
Found out we are here for April, so yay. I really wish we could just get settled somewhere but I guess we won't know whats up for another month.

I've been like sleeping constantly, its annoying and very hard to get me up. And when I am up its hard to stay awake. I could have passed out hours ago but we went out to see friends and now I wanted to get a few things done. Everyone figures its CFS (not just because of the sleepyness but other things as well) and I'd have to agree but until I'm able to find a non doushy doctor I'll have to wait to know for sure.

I'm so tired I could cry.

Knee's have been annoying and I think today my right one (which is bad just not as bad as the other -_-) has had it with me bearing most of my weight on it. It gave out, which isn't unusual but it was a hard one. More pain than usual and James thought he might have to carry me up the stairs. It did it again not even 5mins later and now I have one of my crutches out to hobble along. Annoying...

I feel like I need to do something, just not sure what yet.

I needs my Lude.
questa: (Default)
No other migraines thank god but a couple weeks ago I was down on the floor cleaning kitties food area when my left knee randomly popped out....hard :X

I actually fell forward and face planted, when I hit the floor the knee popped back in place but I was worried I had done some damage. James was at the store when it happened but luckily came home a few minutes later and helped me up off the floor. It wasn't swelling up but it did feel weird and walking was a bitch...but it has been for awhile now.

I've been having more and more trouble with the left knee the past few months and could tell it was deteriorating.

Went and saw the doctor about it a few days later and wondered if he'd just send me away because last time I saw him about it years ago he was like "well you didn't go get physio like your orthopedic surgeon said so nothing I can do". Didn't care that I could not afford it but he said no surgery, try physio first and see if that smooths out the bone growth that grew after the injury.

But he actually listened to me tell him how its been giving out a lot more lately, pain that's always been 24/7 has turned into more intense pain 24/7. And how I cannot bend it all the way, straighten it all the way and when it tilts sideways it wants to pop out. Oh, and how when I'm on the floor either cleaning, playing with the cat or looking at a book at Chapters I CANT GET BACK UP. Without James lifting me up off the ground.

Last x-rays I had were in 2006 so he sent me off for more. Getting them was not fun, I was glad I at least had a gentle tech but even just laying straight out hurt and was hard to do.

Got the results back yesterday and he said although the right one is holding steady the left one has gotten worse. I have moderate Osteoarthritis in that one. Crappy assed news but I'm glad to have a diagnoses. No cure just painkillers (he said keep taking Advil lol which doesn't even begin to touch it), take it easy, get one of those ultra braces that are like $500+ (but that's going to have to wait a few months), he said my weight is fine and to keep it that way as that can make it worse. And that's it until it deteriorates into the next and last stage which usually requires knee replacement surgery.

It really does suck, a brace will be nice but they usually aren't meant to be worn around the house. I'll also probably have to look into getting a few mobility aids that although I've needed for awhile I've been avoiding because having them makes me feel so much more broken. I'd rather suck it up though instead of risking hurting myself.

I'm trying not to let it get to me too much because it could always be worse and there's still lots I can do. And James loves me gimpy or not :P

Rewind back a few weeks and we had a lovely Valentines day, he took me out to dinner and to our favorite cake place. For our second anniversary we just stayed home and he cooked me an amazing dinner then surprised me with fondue and rented a movie I wanted to see that we curled up to watch on the iPad.

Also went to a stitch n bitch, felt kinda weird because everyone else there can sew so well and here I am struggling just to thread my needle lol, I had forgotten to bring my knitting...Still had fun though.

Also had a great time at the last Changeling game, there was an IC wedding and I took pictures of it ^_^

Might limp down to farmers market tomorrow (and possibly be an NPC at Vampire if I can get a ride). Sunday James and I might go to the pet fair. Other than that, no other outstanding plans, just rest.



Soo many photos )
questa: (Hayley & Padme (Rainbows))
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Tie between Sean Comnery and Daniel Craig kthx.
questa: (Blaaaah)
Woke up Friday with a headache but tried to ignore it, later in the day it was still there as I got ready for Changeling but since I felt fine other than that I still went.

Had a good time with my character giving out jewelry and talking to people (specially Emily and Deej) but egads was it hard to act normal and not start crying as the headache got steadily worse. I don't even remember what was said at closing circle I was just leaning on James trying not to fall over. When we got in his car that's when I finally let go and was crying/whimpering. The pain was so bad I wanted to scream.

He got me home and I tried digging through the hall closet trying to find some kind of painkillers but my Mum was like oh hell no, you've never been like this before so up to the ER for you.

Waited about 30mins which wasn't too bad before getting taken into a room, I was still in costume so glitter was everywhere. My vitals were normal, I laid there wishing someone would put a bullet through my skull when the Doctor finally came in. He said it was most likely a migraine (what?! I don't get those! Lets not start now kthx!) so he'd send someone in with a shot of Demerol (never had that before), another nurse came in with it and said it'd be going into my arse. X_x I told her I had many other perfectly injectable area's but into my arse it went. They said to lay there for 15mins but that somehow turned into an hour. Pain had lessened quite a bit but I felt normal other than that....until I sat up then I was like holy crap I'm so stoned o_o They sent me home with 2 Demerol pills which thankfully I haven't needed to take.

Went home, crashed, slept until 2pm, woke up, had a snack, went back to bed until 1am...up for a bit and back to bed. Apparently this is what happens sometimes post migraine....you are exhausted for a couple days. The spot where I was injected was SO PAINFUL OMFG O_O Every time I turned over it woke me. Its almost better now though o_o

So that was my fun filled weekend.....
questa: (F/R love)
I feel like I'm the only person who likes Valentine's Day X_x
and it has nothing to do with being in a relationship, I've always liked it. Sure I was a little disappointed the years I didn't have anyone to share it with but I still enjoyed it. I'd buy chocolate, watch girly movies, get my Mum some flowers and a card, exchange cards with friends. One year I even made a date with a gay friend...although he stood me up the night before because he found a hot guy to go out with lol.

I am a total sucker for all the red and pink, flowers, chocolate, etc...

I happened to ask my brother what he was planning on doing for Dana and he said "Bah, we don't bother with Valentine's Day, its just a manufactured holiday anyway."

Erm, so is Christmas but you both run around buying each other gifts for that X_x

If people really don't like it then that's fine but I really don't get all the hate. Especially the overused like "You should show your love on more than just one day out of the year"

Uh, we do. James and I do stuff like that for each other all year round but that doesn't mean we won't be doing anything special for Valentine's Day.

I already picked him up something special (still need to get something for my Mum and Sierra) and we have plans for the 14th that I am looking forward to ^_^

Also, I kinda want to see the Vow....I feel dirty :X
questa: (Default)


Almost exactly a week after Sierra had her vaccination she started acting a bit out of the ordinary. On the Thursday night she didn't rush over for dinner, I figured she was extra tired so I brought her dish over to the bed and she ate. She didn't bother wanting a bedtime snack and even weirder...she didn't wake us up for breakfast.

I fed her anyway but she didn't touch it, she also wasn't drinking which was really worrying, not playing and sleeping a lot. I called the vet for advice and they said it was the expected side effects from the vaccine and not to bother bringing her in unless she was still like this on Monday. And now here is where I seriously kick myself because we did not have a child's rectal thermometer. If we did...I would have known she'd had a temp of 105 :X!

I tried to get a bit of food into her and was squirting water into her mouth whenever I could. Got her into the vet Monday morning and that's when he took her temp and told us she was running an infection. He kept asking what other cat's she's been around etc...and we told him just the office kitty, she hasn't been out anywhere since Christmas. He kept insisting it wasn't a side effect of the vaccination but after doing several hours of reading I really don't believe that. I think she had a REALLY bad reaction to it :X

He said he wanted to keep her there for the day to get some IV fluids and antibiotics into her and also do a blood test so we could find out what the infection was. It was hard leaving her there but we knew she needed it and we went home to scramble putting some money together.

Picked her up later that evening and he showed us how to force feed her...o_o I don't think I've ever seen Sierra so angry. When we got her home she ran out of her carrier and into the litter-box to do the biggest pee we've ever seen. Then she spazzed out running around, not happy with the long day, shaved fur on her paw and neck (she has sensitive skin) and even more pissed with the blue wrap around her paw that we were told to keep on for another half hour.

She flung it across the room 10mins later....but thankfully there was no bleeding.

I managed to distract her by putting her favourite bird video on Youtube on the iPad, so she calmed down a bit and laid down with me to watch. She had to take antibiotics twice a day which was fine for the first two days thanks to Greenies Pill Pockets but after that she would not touch them. Thankfully the pills were tiny so with a bit of fighting I was able to just pop them into her.

Over the last 2 weeks she's slowly gotten back to normal. She just finished her pills the other day and seems fine now, maybe a little less energy than she had before but she's eating the same, waking us up EARLY, wanting playtime's and stuff. Now she just needs to gain back that pound she lost.

----

We should know where we are going to be by the end of the month. As soon as James finishes his demo reel and isn't so crazy busy he can start shopping his resume around. If he gets a job asap then we will move into a one bedroom in the building we are already in. Preferably the one next door with the big front window XD The manager already knows we are interested. Plan B. is put some of the furniture here into storage, rent a trailer and go back to Alberta for a bit. His house has already had a new roof and windows put in which is good. It just needs a girl's touch to make it really nice~

I'm fine with either option.

Chattering at the birds

January 2013

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